Dating avoidant attachment style

08-Feb-2016 05:35 by erkki689 4 Comments

Dating avoidant attachment style - Online sex

About 56 percent of people in the world are secure. Twenty-three percent are avoidant, and the remaining 1 percent are a rare combination of anxious and avoidant.

None of these attachment styles are labeled “healthy” or “unhealthy.” They’re simply descriptions of the way you act in romantic relationships. People with secure attachment styles typically feel comfortable with intimacy, and they are usually warm and loving. You don’t play games, and you’re not overly dramatic.We have been given tons of romance advice that tells us how we should act in relationships: Don’t be too needy, don’t get too jealous and have a strong sense of independence.But none of this advice is “good advice.” You can listen to these people and always try to not feel jealous, not be annoyed at little details and not be too needy. The explanation behind why we behave this way lies in “attachment theory.” Attachment theory is based on the idea that we’ve been programmed by evolution to single out certain individuals in our lives and make them precious to us.Although we have a basic need to form these special bonds with individuals, the ways we create these bonds vary.Everyone in our society, whether he or she has never dated before or been married for 50 years, falls into one of three attachment styles: secure, anxious or avoidant.If you're avoidant, you might feel like you’re not ready to commit.

You focus on small imperfections in your partner, and you notice when people try to infringe upon your independence.

People with avoidant attachment styles tend to think being in a relationship will “tie them down” while they pursue their goals.

People with anxious attachment styles generally crave intimacy.

They are often preoccupied with their relationships, and they tend to worry about their partner’s ability to love them back.

If you're anxious, you withdraw during conflict, get jealous and worried easily, and may act busy when you’re not.

People with avoidant attachment styles equate intimacy with loss of independence, and they constantly try to minimize closeness.

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